My Grandfathers Legacy
creative writing
I don’t have trouble falling asleep, I have trouble staying asleep. I find it easy to fall asleep because once my head hits the pillow I’m ready for tomorrow. The issue, I think, comes from my brains’ constant feeling that “there’s something that needs to be done yesterday” that has remained a constant in my life thanks to procrastination and juggling of responsibilities.
On Tuesday, January 25th, 2022 at 3:15am I burst out of sleep as I normally do before my 4:30am alarm to find an urgent text message on my phone. My grandfather passed away peacefully in his sleep that night. Instead of my usual routine: going back to sleep and ignoring my 4:30am alarm for 30 minutes, I looked at air travel and planned to go to Mexico to be present at the funeral.
Despite the sadness and rush I was blessed to have not only access to air travel and paid bereavement leave, but also to be present in any way that could be helpful to my family while providing some form of closure to myself. This writing is not about the events that transpired after I got the news, but rather serves as a reflection on the lessons my grandfather left me. I do this in the hopes that you may find value in his lessons through what helps me process my emotions: writing.
Commitment, Responsibility, Effort.
My grandfathers life motto.
“Cre” in Spanish means “believe”.
What he left behind at the wake:
My grandfather was many things, but what struck me most from his wake was the consistency of his life. My grandfather always acted with love and kindness to me as his grandchild, but also pushed a very specific life philosophy.
He worked on my grandmothers family ranch (now gone), in artisanry (leather cutting) and in engineering (machinery repairs) - but lived his life with three driving forces of commitment, responsibility, and effort that moved his life forward with honor and dedication. Clearly, this life philosophy permeated every facet of his life, because in the midst of his 24 hour wake we heard countless stories of my grandfathers resilience.
While many spoke of his intelligence, ingenuity, and unwavering faith, there was a consistent underlying theme that reminded you:
my grandfather was a man of principle and belief.
A legacy that many of us should hope to achieve. While my grandfather was so much more to me and our extended family - he left behind a fire of belief that I recognize in myself and my father that will hopefully be passed down to the next generation as well.
More than moving on.
Remembering loved ones in a more proactive way
There were always summers at the grandparents
Beyond the burial:
I spent 4 days in Leon for my Grandfathers funeral and things moved so fast that I still haven’t really processed the loss. I had the overwhelming blessing of access to my grandparents for many years, spending multiple summers at my grandparents home in Leon with them and my extended family.
During the wake, my grandmother realized she was missing my grandfathers favorite Rosary (a Mexican and Catholic must have) - so she sent my cousins and I to retrieve it. We took advantage of the trip to spend some time at my grandparents home, reminiscing on the memories he left us with.
It was during this exchange and throughout the songs sung by family at the burial that I found three recognitions:
Your legacy will bring many people together, your life will decide if those people exchange good memories or bad ones.
We have a responsibility to seek out the ones we love, to make an effort, and to enjoy them while they are present.
Mexican groundskeepers work incredibly fast, and funerals much like a lifetime will end quicker than you think.
Closing notes:
Life and work never stop, but we have to make a moment to appreciate what we have. I am grateful to life and my parents for giving me so much time with my grandfather, but I also recognize the cost of those opportunities. The night before we left: my parents and I sat in a hotel room, all working on separate computers waiting for our final dinner of room service to arrive.
Many people would find a moment like that unhealthy, but my family and I bond over these moments. This experience has taught me that when forming your daily life perspective the trick is:
to view the simple, quiet, and average times with joy rather than regret.
to always maintain belief, even in situations that seem bleak.
and to make an effort where it counts - especially in showing love to others.
I’ll be working on living up to these lessons, and hope that in the passing of my grandfather you too can find something worth believing in.